a while back I was going to the same hairdresser. The conversations where always fun but she had a boyfriend. Then the last time she invited to take me shopping as I had said that I hated doing it.

I initially thought this showed interest however when I told a friend he says that shopping (for clothes) is a friendzone move by her. I think he read it in "the game". I'm not sure and just wanted to ask your oppinion as it happened again recently. Personally i think it's more of a safe date for her, a chance to evaluate me without "cheating" on her boyfriend.

Btw - both times i didn't take them up on the offer as last year i sort of just took a break (to lick my wounds) but now im seeking to get back and im just curious about this.

Its a friend zone move.

Your buddy is right.

Go if your gut instinct is telling you that its a way for her to size you up as a romantic interest but cut this off quickly and do not go again if it seems she is transitioning you for a full blown friendship by telling you her life story and asking you for relationship advice and all that other emotional tampon bs-ing tricky chickies like to pull.

Depends.

Who are you shopping FOR? You or her?

I had a chick one time offer to help ME shop for some clothes one time. She helped me pick out some stuff that I wouldn't have bought for myself. She didn't so much as look at one thing for herself.

In a case like that it could go either way. If you are shopping for stuff for HER....forget it.

In my case it was a chick I knew from my AFC days who popped back into my life AFTER I found sosuave, and I was taken aback as to how to handle her. I'm about 99% sure I could have fukked the hell outa her (she was cute and had some GORGEOUS t!tties), but all I could think of was how much of a pu$$y I was when I first met her so I never went through with it.

So yea, most of the time the shopping offer is a bad sign, but use common sense and take it on a case by case basis.

LOL i HATE shopping for clothes. I use clothes shopping as a date. I invite some girl along to help "this helpless male" pick out good clothes.

There's no way I'd do it alone and i flirt a little with the female employees right in front of the girl i brought to help me. I pretty much let her pick out the clothes that look good on me... this way it even helps me with women later because I really have no idea what looks good on me.. I view it as an action date and the girl has fun doing what girls do and it's natural to kino while handing shirts back and forth and her holding pants up to you to see if it's your size and stuff... even take them into the dressing room sometimes. Ohhh don't mind me taking off my shirt so you can see my built chest.. i mean try on this shirt.. haha

It brings up situations to tease her about her taste in clothing too. And when you see her again she's all proud that you're wearing the shirt she picked out and wants to "feel the fabric" with you wearing it.. heh.



I don't know how you're suppose to know if an invite like that is friend zone move. Just go and turn on the charm.. my "shopping" date has a 100% eventual sex success rate.. of course they don't invite ME.

mrRuckus said:

I pretty much let her pick out the clothes that look good on me... this way it even helps me with women later because I really have no idea what looks good on me.

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Amen.

It's ALWAYS good to have a female opinion about clothes.

I'm pretty good at designing stuff and such, but when it comes to advice on what "looks good" on me, there is no substitute for getting the thumbs up from a chick.

yea i was moaning about the fact i hate shopping for clothes for me.

That's how I saw it "an action date".

Just the fact that she would take a day out to do something for me in my oppinion has to be a good thing. Btw the first mentioned the bf once at the beginng and after that no, the second did talk more about him but I prob brought him up most of the time. Neither girls I was gaming, just having friendly convos.

Thanks guys, if it happens again I'll go but keep an ear out for bs friendzone putting convos just to be on the safe side.

Shopping not bad if it is you who does the inviting, and you are the one leading the way.

Going to shop for her means her gay friend wasn't available, her girlfriends weren't available; nothing sexual about that.

Take her lingerie shopping. :yes:

Its a perfect oppertuinty to gauge her interest in you. Have fun with it, if she picks something not to your liking, make fun of yourself wearing it, and make fun of her for having such a bad taste.

After the shopping you can go have a nice small meal and drinks and see where it goes.

No real DJ is ever worried about the "friendzone". Think about it.

iqqi said:

No real DJ is ever worried about the "friendzone". Think about it.

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Correct; yet a "real DJ" knows how to be efficient with time/effort. He knows some time management and when not to waste his time. I mean, why go play somebody else's game, in their backyard, with their rules, etc., specially when there is a good chance she already sees him as a non-sexually threatening "friend".

No "real DJ" ever gets into the "friendzone" to begin with. Think about it.

Danger said:

Right on GOL,

I've had women ask me several times to go shopping, my reponse is always the same "I'm a guy, I hate shopping. Give me a call when you're done and we'll go to the batting cages.".

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Yes, the only time you go shopping with them is when you need female input for stuff you are shopping for either yourself, or as a gift. You invite her to come to your territory, your game, your rules; even at that, you tell her you hate shopping and to please make it quick.

The batting cages? I'm gonna add that to my tool box of things to do and say.

Action dates? I like that batting cage thing.

The beach.

Arcade type of restaurant/bars.

Miniature golf (as lame as it sounds, almost as good as the coffee date to broads).

Shopping area where you find random, odd items. Here in LA there's Venice beach where you can go and spend hours on a boardwalk with random, obscure items.

Workout date. Make sure you can keep up though. Can be weight training, jogging, etc.

Go play catch at the park, with mits/gloves, and tease her about how "girly" she tosses the baseball.

If you are outgoing, go sing karaoke. Very fun environment, as you can go make fun of the other people singing.

I'll come up with more and put 'em on the Tips forum.

iqqi said:

No real DJ is ever worried about the "friendzone". Think about it.

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I haven't been in the friend zone in close to five years. I'm not bragging or anything because I have my downfalls elsewhere, but I just think you make a good point. The friend zone doesn't really exist unless you want it or you let it exist somehow. It's probably been three or four years since a girl has tried to put me in the friend zone. It kind of becomes a non-factor eventually.

I think the shopping date could go either way, but it's pretty situational. If you've done a good job of piquing this girl's interest, then it's date, but if you haven't it probably is a friend's zone kind of thing. Regardless, I think you should go and game her up the entire time.

You really don't have anything to lose from going. If you get the friend vibe from her, use her as social proof and hit on the women who work at the stores you shop at. If you're successful enough at that, you could raise your hairdresser's IL as well.

MikeYikes122 said:

I haven't been in the friend zone in close to five years. I'm not bragging or anything because I have my downfalls elsewhere, but I just think you make a good point. The friend zone doesn't really exist unless you want it or you let it exist somehow. It's probably been three or four years since a girl has tried to put me in the friend zone. It kind of becomes a non-factor eventually.

You really don't have anything to lose from going. If you get the friend vibe from her, use her as social proof and hit on the women who work at the stores you shop at. If you're successful enough at that, you could raise your hairdresser's IL as well.

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Same here.

I know dozens of women, but they are either casual acquaintances, strictly platonic friends (meaning I do not have desire for sex with them), or there is SOME kind of sexual vibe between us that I play off of. But as far as rejection goes I don't hang out socially with women who have rejected me. Hanging out with chicks that have rejected you.....that's pretty much the definition of "friend zone".

I am a FIRM believer that for some men the female friend thing WORKS and works WELL. I agree with most of what Rollo says, but the whole "If you aren't fukking her, she's your girlfriend" thing is a great rule for newbies prone to getting sucked into the vortex, but for someone who is conscious of their behavior and doesn't lie to themselves it doesn't necessarily apply. It's kind of like fire. If you are careless you get burned, but if you are careful and know how to harness its power to your advantage it's a different story.

Just gotta make sure you aren't sitting below the table hoping and waiting for scraps cause that's where the problems come in.