I know this is a generic borderline newbie question but I'm just interested in the responses.

Me and this girl made plans for Friday when she says she's free. The plus is, she has a high IL, so I pretty much don't have to screw up and things should be cool.

I've hung out w/ female friends over the last year, but this its been a while since I've been on a formal "date" ( i really hate that word, but its the best word for this question I guess).

Anyways I want to keep is fun and loose. So I was thinking a bar or a club, checking a movie, or probably just getting something to eat. From reading Anti Dumps posts, the best thing for guys is "action dates"

What do you guys usually do? My past first "dates" have been movies and those ones always turned out pretty "eh". I was thinking if there was something different you guys usually do.

Thanks

It's been said many times, but it always holds true.......never "date" until after you are fukking her.

What do you do? You hang out. You do whatever you want to do. You aren't a three ring circus.....don't feel the need to entertain her. Yea, you gotta keep it interesting and create attraction, but an action date is basically a crutch to lean on to keep the mood light and fun.

"Dating" creates expectations and sets the frame squarely on her side.

Great, thanks bro

You do whatever you want to do.

Yes. Do what is fun for you. Then you are a 'fun guy' and she will have a good time. Trying to impress her or do what she wants, show her a good time, all of that is the wrong frame. Have fun yourself, and she will, too.

From reading Anti Dumps posts, the best thing for guys is "action dates"

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Well, not for the first date. Maybe the 4th. First, just get to know her. Any of your ideas are good, or a cafe.

Bible_Belt said:

You do whatever you want to do.

Yes. Do what is fun for you. Then you are a 'fun guy' and she will have a good time. Trying to impress her or do what she wants, show her a good time, all of that is the wrong frame. Have fun yourself, and she will, too.

Click to expand...

A big part of the attraction process is "bringing a woman into your world". Women LIVE for that. She attaches her value to the value she perceives her man to possess.

You will attract a woman infinitely faster by bringing her into your world as opposed to trying to adapt to what you perceive hers to be to appease her.

And what if you are the kind of guy who doesn't do anything? Bring her to my house and have her watch me browse sosuave

I think taking her out for lunch or for coffee is a good first "hang out."

Lunch might be a bit tight, because if the conversation isn't so great you'll feel awkward. BUT you said she has high IL. As such, any place should work out.