Alec Baldwin: Major AFC; Out of Control

[Francisco d'Anconia]

The actor (used loosely) Alec Baldwin has been in a tumultuous custody battle with Kim Basinger. It has exposed his AFC ways as shown in a voice mail message obtained by TMZ.com. Fellas, whatever happens in your life, don't become this guy. Oh yeah, he's not talking to Kim.

Listen to the voice mail message. (http://www.aolcdn.com/tmz_audio/0419_baldwin.mp3)

[sexxyback]

aha

he's talking to his 11 year old daughter

[Vulpine]

Whoa, dude needs to change his tampon.

sh!t, ass, thoughtless little pig... great parenting. That's how you talk to a "12 year old, or, 11 year old, or child".

Nice, dude doesn't even know how old his daughter is. Uh, I wouldn't bother answering the phone, either.

Alec got pwned by an 11 year-old girl.
:crackup:

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Anyone care to guess the real issue here?

[Vulpine]

Already know it, don't need to discuss it.

[sexxyback]

He's involved in a custody battle with Kim Basinger for the kid. The kid never answers the phone when he's supposed to call. Alec Baldwin is high strung and loses his cool a lot, apparently.

[DJDamage]

Anyone care to guess the real issue here?

Al-ec is an Al-cholic?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

He's involved in a custody battle with Kim Basinger for the kid. The kid never answers the phone when he's supposed to call. Alec Baldwin is high strung and loses his cool a lot, apparently.

All true, but why is he losing it this time?

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Al-ec is an Al-cholic?

Perhaps, I don't know. Although I'm pretty sure that he was sober during this call. Hmmmmm, what's really causing this?

[Roly]

Dude give this guy some freakin slack. The life of a celebrity can be very turbulant and all of us are bound to lose it once in a while.

That and he was awesome in " The Shadow". Lol, I had that action figure once.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Dude give this guy some freakin slack. The life of a celebrity can be very turbulant and all of us are bound to lose it once in a while.

And what about his daughter?

[sexxyback]

Imagine the guy from 'Glengarry Glen Ross' as your dad, yelling at you every night. That would suck.

[Wyldfire]

Wow...Alec Baldwin is channeling my ex husband...but with less profanity.

Here's what's going on...he's trying to put the poor kid in the middle of his issues with her mother. Big no-no. It's not the girl's fault her parents can't get along and trying to pull them into it is wrong. He called her names and insulted her throughout the entire phone message and threatened her. No wonder she doesn't pick up the phone.

And no...he doesn't deserve to get any slack...he is an adult and she is a child. Besides...screeching like a lunatic at your kids only make them tune you out. You have to talk WITH them, not AT them.

His daughter is already well on her way to hating her father...and although he will likely blame her mother and insist the girl was "brainwashed" against him...it's his own damn fault.

[RedPill]

Imagine the guy from 'Glengarry Glen Ross' as your dad, yelling at you every night. That would suck.
You know what it takes to pick up women son? It takes brass balls to pick up women.

You see this watch? You see this watch? Son that watch costs most than your big wheel. :cuss:

[DarthJuan]

[QUOTE=Roly]Dude give this guy some freakin slack. The life of a celebrity can be very turbulant and all of us are bound to lose it once in a while.
QUOTE]

The guy has a history of being a douchebag.

http://www.tmz.com/2006/10/12/baldwin-to-nypd-i-see-the-plane-crash-now-move/

[Wyldfire]

The important point is this...it doesn't matter how frustrated he is with his ex wife. It doesn't matter how many people pulled his chain or made things difficult for him. That's his DAUGHTER he said all the crap to - the same daughter he claims to love so much that he'll fight for 6 years for custody.

I read through some of the history and it reminds me a great deal of what I went through during my own divorce. Bottom line...my ex husband has never gotten over me leaving him and is very bitter. He has absolutely no self-control whatsoever and to compensate for that he felt compelled to try to control me...and later our children. He's incapable of handling any close interpersonal relationship. After I left him, he tried to control me through our children, through the courts, even trying to start problems within my extended family. Everytime he saw or talked to our children he would spend the entire time ranting about how I kidnapped them and left him and how big of a victim he was. Our oldest daughter was old enough to remember how he was when we lived with him...so he alienated her pretty quickly. She knew he was lying. I never brought up their father at all. They would bring him up and question me about the things he had said to them. I would say "Your father loves you very much and is just angry right now. That's not how it really happened, but it's probably just the anger talking. The next time he starts saying stuff like that just tell him it hurts you when he does it and ask him to please stop it."

Fast forward to when my daughter was the same age as Alec Baldwin's daughter...she had a friend over and didn't want to talk to him on the phone one time...and he called several times a week and she always talked to him, even when she didn't want to. I asked her to talk to him for a couple of minutes just to explain why she didn't want to talk this time. He called her an idiot, insulted her friend, called her a ***** and told her she was just like me. After that, it all went downhill. Fast forward a couple of more years...my fiance' and a man my kids adored died. Her father called as soon as he heard of my fiance's death. He KNEW our children loved him very much and were grieving a loss. Know what he told our 13 year old daughter? He said that the day my fiance' died was the happiest day of his life and he was celebrating that he died. That was the day she began to hate her father. The boys took longer to hate him...but they had become annoyed with his behavior and had lost all respect for him. Our oldest son started hating his father after his father started all kinds of problems between my son and his uncle...made wild and untrue accusations and then cut off all contact with our son after the mess he had caused for him. A year later he showed up in our town and expected our son to just see him and act like nothing had happened. He was 15 at the time and in high school. His father started showing up at his school insisting on seeing our son, embarrassing him to no end. Our son wrote him a letter asking his father to leave him alone, and he needed time to get over what had happened. His father began stalking him at school and trying to force our son to see him. He filed a motion accusing me of not allowing our son to see him, lol. We went to court and the guardian ad litem told the court that it was my son who didn't want to see his father and that I had not influenced him at all...and that I had actually told my son that if he wanted to see his father he could...it was up to him. The judge granted my son's request through the guardian that he not be forced to have any contact with his father unless he chose it.

So my ex was down to only one of his kids speaking to him. I felt bad and our youngest son has Oppositional Defiant Disorder and can be difficult to deal with at times. Upheaval like my ex moving to the state and harassing our other son led to the ODD flaring up. I asked our younger son if he wanted to try living with his father for awhile. He said he did so I let him. His father refused to let our son visit and see his siblings even though our son wanted to visit. All he did all day, every day was rant about me. During one of these tirades our son told him off, saying he was sick of his father's whining all the time. His father physically assaulted him and landed in jail. I got a phone call from the Vermont State Police to come pick up my son. We went to court to get a restraining order and eventually got the same set up as my older son did. My younger son's lawyer was extremely impressed with how intelligent, clear and concise he was about where he stood.

Alec Baldwin is doing the same thing to his daughter that my ex did to his kids...and I can guarantee you that the girl didn't pick up the phone because the conversations with him are always hurtful to her. Just like my ex husband, he hates his ex more than he loves his kid.

[Call_Me_Daddy]

The important point is this...it doesn't matter how frustrated he is with his ex wife. It doesn't matter how many people pulled his chain or made things difficult for him. That's his DAUGHTER he said all the crap to - the same daughter he claims to love so much that he'll fight for 6 years for custody.

I read through some of the history and it reminds me a great deal of what I went through during my own divorce. Bottom line...my ex husband has never gotten over me leaving him and is very bitter. He has absolutely no self-control whatsoever and to compensate for that he felt compelled to try to control me...and later our children. He's incapable of handling any close interpersonal relationship. After I left him, he tried to control me through our children, through the courts, even trying to start problems within my extended family. Everytime he saw or talked to our children he would spend the entire time ranting about how I kidnapped them and left him and how big of a victim he was. Our oldest daughter was old enough to remember how he was when we lived with him...so he alienated her pretty quickly. She knew he was lying. I never brought up their father at all. They would bring him up and question me about the things he had said to them. I would say "Your father loves you very much and is just angry right now. That's not how it really happened, but it's probably just the anger talking. The next time he starts saying stuff like that just tell him it hurts you when he does it and ask him to please stop it."

Fast forward to when my daughter was the same age as Alec Baldwin's daughter...she had a friend over and didn't want to talk to him on the phone one time...and he called several times a week and she always talked to him, even when she didn't want to. I asked her to talk to him for a couple of minutes just to explain why she didn't want to talk this time. He called her an idiot, insulted her friend, called her a ***** and told her she was just like me. After that, it all went downhill. Fast forward a couple of more years...my fiance' and a man my kids adored died. Her father called as soon as he heard of my fiance's death. He KNEW our children loved him very much and were grieving a loss. Know what he told our 13 year old daughter? He said that the day my fiance' died was the happiest day of his life and he was celebrating that he died. That was the day she began to hate her father. The boys took longer to hate him...but they had become annoyed with his behavior and had lost all respect for him. Our oldest son started hating his father after his father started all kinds of problems between my son and his uncle...made wild and untrue accusations and then cut off all contact with our son after the mess he had caused for him. A year later he showed up in our town and expected our son to just see him and act like nothing had happened. He was 15 at the time and in high school. His father started showing up at his school insisting on seeing our son, embarrassing him to no end. Our son wrote him a letter asking his father to leave him alone, and he needed time to get over what had happened. His father began stalking him at school and trying to force our son to see him. He filed a motion accusing me of not allowing our son to see him, lol. We went to court and the guardian ad litem told the court that it was my son who didn't want to see his father and that I had not influenced him at all...and that I had actually told my son that if he wanted to see his father he could...it was up to him. The judge granted my son's request through the guardian that he not be forced to have any contact with his father unless he chose it.

So my ex was down to only one of his kids speaking to him. I felt bad and our youngest son has Oppositional Defiant Disorder and can be difficult to deal with at times. Upheaval like my ex moving to the state and harassing our other son led to the ODD flaring up. I asked our younger son if he wanted to try living with his father for awhile. He said he did so I let him. His father refused to let our son visit and see his siblings even though our son wanted to visit. All he did all day, every day was rant about me. During one of these tirades our son told him off, saying he was sick of his father's whining all the time. His father physically assaulted him and landed in jail. I got a phone call from the Vermont State Police to come pick up my son. We went to court to get a restraining order and eventually got the same set up as my older son did. My younger son's lawyer was extremely impressed with how intelligent, clear and concise he was about where he stood.

Alec Baldwin is doing the same thing to his daughter that my ex did to his kids...and I can guarantee you that the girl didn't pick up the phone because the conversations with him are always hurtful to her. Just like my ex husband, he hates his ex more than he loves his kid.

NO ONE GIVES A RAT'S ASS ABOUT YOUR BABY'S DADDY AND HOW YOU WERE A MORON TO BE KNOCKED UP BY A DUDE WHO'S NOW IN PRISON.

[Wyldfire]

Call_Me_Daddy
This message is hidden because Call_Me_Daddy is on your ignore list.

I've been putting all trolls on ignore...but this one keeps right on posting right after I post anything. Talk about desperate for female attention...

actually...two in a row on ignore...too funny.

[Juan_Man]

When I first heard the message, I was like "man, this guy is nuts!" Then I thought about it for a while and was like "wait a minute, my parents used to tell me off like that all the time." I guess I forgot that sometimes a parent has to be firm when the child is acting up. But I agree with Wyldfire that he was out of line when he brought his daughter's mother into this.

[lookyoung]

NO ONE GIVES A RAT'S ASS ABOUT YOUR BABY'S DADDY AND HOW YOU WERE A MORON TO BE KNOCKED UP BY A DUDE WHO'S NOW IN PRISON.



Wow I am going to neg rep you for this post. You really should be banned. Why would you flame a poster for giving us a real life situation?

[Wyldfire]

Because he's a troll...

Just put him on ignore, then he'll go back to playing with himself...like he's used to doing. lol

[Master Bates]

That doesn't even sound like Alec Baldwin.

[Wyldfire]

When I first heard the message, I was like "man, this guy is nuts!" Then I thought about it for a while and was like "wait a minute, my parents used to tell me off like that all the time." I guess I forgot that sometimes a parent has to be firm when the child is acting up. But I agree with Wyldfire that he was out of line when he brought his daughter's mother into this.

He was out of line throughout the whole thing. Every parent gets frustrated and angry with their kids...I sure do...but it's not just what he said, but how he said it. That message is verbal and emotional abuse, no doubt about it. He called her names, threatened her and tried to intimidate her. That's just weak. He screams and berates people like that all the time from what I've been hearing on the news.

This is more than him screwing up...his so called apology was full of excuses and him blaming his ex wife. He hates his ex more than he loves his daughter, and that about sums it up. The judge in this matter should leave it up to the girl...let her decide when to call him or when she wants to visit...but don't force the kid to have to put up with abuse like that.

[Wyldfire]

That doesn't even sound like Alec Baldwin.

It was him...he admitted to it.

[e-lie]

Hey he's good actor cant say the same for his bros you trolls need to lay off I blame all the trolls here on the community being in the media in the last couple of years they should all be band .By the way he will get through this trust me:)

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Here's my take on it, the guy is still twisted in knots over his failed relationship with Kim Basinger and he's projecting his frustration of Kim onto their daughter (good surrogate huh?). Listen to the recording again and imagine that he was talking to Kim:

Bending over backwards to contact her but she doesn't answer or return his calls.
She makes him feel embarrassed.
He feels that she doesn't treat other people the way that she treats him.
He believes that she's a pig
He's going to set her straight.Sounds like a AFC who's pissed off at his ex to me. Unfortunately his little one isn't just catching the fallout of this failed relationship, she's getting his frustration and bitterness aimed directly at her.

I'll say it again; fellas, whatever happens in your relationships, don't become frustrated and bitter like this guy. No matter the justification, it doesn't look good.

[Rata Blanca]

Anyone care to guess the real issue here?

He got married.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

He got married.

To a woman who wasn't truly compatible with him. Most guys just date the wrong woman but there are always those who are so enamored with the concept of marriage, they forgo finding out if the woman they're with is worth the effort.

[Rata Blanca]

To a woman who wasn't truly compatible with him. Most guys just date the wrong woman but there are always those who are so enamored with the concept of marriage, they forgo finding out if the woman they're with is worth the effort.

Exactly. About a week ago I was talking with a man in his 30's via skype about his divorce. Their marriage lasted 2 years and he has to pay child support. At the end I simply asked him:
how long was she your girlfriend?
"5 months"

[Wyldfire]

Here's my take on it, the guy is still twisted in knots over his failed relationship with Kim Basinger and he's projecting his frustration of Kim onto their daughter (good surrogate huh?). Listen to the recording again and imagine that he was talking to Kim:

Bending over backwards to contact her but she doesn't answer or return his calls.
She makes him feel embarrassed.
He feels that she doesn't treat other people the way that she treats him.
He believes that she's a pig
He's going to set her straight.Sounds like a AFC who's pissed off at his ex to me. Unfortunately his little one isn't just catching the fallout of this failed relationship, she's getting his frustration and bitterness aimed directly at her.

I'll say it again; fellas, whatever happens in your relationships, don't become frustrated and bitter like this guy. No matter the justification, it doesn't look good.

And people wonder why so many kids end up thinking it's their fault their parents split up. I don't care how pissed he is at his ex...there is just no excuse for him talking to his daughter that way. His ex won't talk to him so he can't berate her so he hurts his ex by hurting their child because it's the only avenue he has to hurt the ex. Alec Baldwin doesn't deserve to have any contact with his daughter at all unless SHE chooses to have contact. In cases like this...leave it up to the kid so they have the control.

[Wyldfire]

I don't hate men...I just have absolutely no respect for assholes and think they are completely and utterly useless. Anyone who treats their child as Alec Baldwin did is an arsehole. Kim Basinger could be the most evil, rotten woman on the planet and it would still not excuse Baldwin's behavior towards his child. If it were Basinger who left a message like that I would be saying the same thing about her. If the man loved his daughter more than he hates his ex-wife he wouldn't have an 11 year old daughter who quite clearly doesn't wish to speak to him.

[sexxyback]

I don't hate men...I just have absolutely no respect for assholes and think they are completely and utterly useless. Anyone who treats their child as Alec Baldwin did is an arsehole. Kim Basinger could be the most evil, rotten woman on the planet and it would still not excuse Baldwin's behavior towards his child. If it were Basinger who left a message like that I would be saying the same thing about her. If the man loved his daughter more than he hates his ex-wife he wouldn't have an 11 year old daughter who quite clearly doesn't wish to speak to him.


Were you there through all the BS that happens throughout their bitter 6 year custody battle? Do you honestly have a right to judge this situation from one voice mail message that was illegally leaked?

My dad has said much worse to me over the years, and has done worse. I've deserved it on many occasion, and I'm a better person for the occasional harsh discipline hat was dealt to me when I was a stupid kid.

[Wyldfire]

Were you there through all the BS that happens throughout their bitter 6 year custody battle? Do you honestly have a right to judge this situation from one voice mail message that was illegally leaked?

My dad has said much worse to me over the years, and has done worse. I've deserved it on many occasion, and I'm a better person for the occasional harsh discipline hat was dealt to me when I was a stupid kid.

I went through a similar situation myself...hence the personal story I told. That could have just as easily been my ex husband on the phone. I saw my own children get treated just like that (and much, much worse) by their father and I know how badly it hurt them. I also know that over time it has caused them to hate their father and never want to see or talk to him again.

No child deserves to be treated like Alec Baldwin treated his daughter. That was NOT discipline. That was a man who is mad at his ex wife and taking it out on his child by calling her names, threatening her and berating her...for not answering the phone. She didn't steal the family car or get caught drinking or stealing. She didn't pick up the phone. You've thought about why he left that message. Have you thought about why his daughter didn't pick up the phone? I can tell you why, because it's probably the same reason my kids wouldn't talk to their father or didn't want to. I can almost guarantee you that he uses that phone time to biotch about his ex wife, question his daughter about what his ex is doing, saying, etc.

Bottom line...if Baldwin wants any chance of his daughter wanting a relationship with him then he needs to go into therapy and anger management counseling for awhile and have no contact with his daughter at all until he has successfully completed anger management. He needs to cool off and learn how to NOT do this to his kid. And his kid should NOT be forced to have to talk to or see someone who hurts her. I don't care if he's her father or not. That girl has the right not to be verbally and emotionally abused by her own father. The phone message was abuse, NOT discipline.

[grinder]

Francisco, dontcha hate it when nobody plays Menon in your dialogue? Ah, the nature of virtue…..but I digress.

It is one of the more perfect illustrative examples of the ANTI-DJ or AFCism.

1) A DJ is in control of his life. Mr. Baldwin has given over all power and control to his X and child. And he seems somewhat unhappy about this, yet, is not aware of it.
2) Having given away all power he becomes angry and bitter. He blames those to whom he gave the power to.
3) He targets the most innocent and blameless one because this mirrors exactly the level he is functioning on. He IS an 11 year old girl.
4) A DJ is self-aware, has the capability to learn and adapt. The example cited is but one of many over the years. He keeps doing the wrong thing but never learns from his mistakes.
5) A DJ prioritizes what is important in his life. He knows that by taking care of himself he is much better able to take care of others, his children. A happy DJ is a great father who can afford to make sacrifices for his children. Why? Because his capacity and ability are expanded.
6) A DJ, having reached consciousness, is aware that what falls into his hands is more easily held than what is brutishly clutched.

[~attrACTION~]

A new law banning physical discipline from parents to children? The media turning nothing into something for the braindead sheeple to ponder in wonderment or better yet who gives a fvck?

Seriously.

If people actually had a life, they wouldn't care what some celebrity said to his daughter. It seems in America we're ultra-obsessed with the private lives of celebrities.

Well guess what, I bet you there are 1000x worse things going on in the lives of members of this forum and other non-celebrity men. You guys need to grow up. When I was younger, I would get a beating. That phone call seems quite polite compared to the treatment I got from my parents.

Makes me wonder what kind of utopias you guys grew up in.

Besides, let's stop overanalyzing the lives of celebrities. Get off Brad Pitt's d*ck for God sakes. That's for the teens and chicks who read People magazine because they don't have enough drama in their own lives. Can't a man show some emotion?

You guys are way too fake on here. No man is an emotionless robot like most of you preach. So what the guy lost his cool and got angry. He's not allowed to get angry at some dumb daughter he had with a hor he doesn't love any more? Give him a break, or better yet put yourself in his shoes. And don't say you wouldn't do xyz, I bet tons of you guys have had regrets that have led to unpleasant situations. Remember we're humans here, not robots.

[~attrACTION~]

Besides, life isn't so cut and dry like a multiple choice test. If it was that simple every guy on this site would just read the DJB and get laid on day one. No one would have girl problems at all. Get real you guys.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Francisco, dontcha hate it when nobody plays Menon in your dialogue? Ah, the nature of virtue…..but I digress.
Yeah, but every once in a while someone actually looks beyond the surface actions and asks "why?"

It is one of the more perfect illustrative examples of the ANTI-DJ or AFCism.

1) A DJ is in control of his life. Mr. Baldwin has given over all power and control to his X and child. And he seems somewhat unhappy about this, yet, is not aware of it.
2) Having given away all power he becomes angry and bitter. He blames those to whom he gave the power to.
3) He targets the most innocent and blameless one because this mirrors exactly the level he is functioning on. He IS an 11 year old girl.
4) A DJ is self-aware, has the capability to learn and adapt. The example cited is but one of many over the years. He keeps doing the wrong thing but never learns from his mistakes.
5) A DJ prioritizes what is important in his life. He knows that by taking care of himself he is much better able to take care of others, his children. A happy DJ is a great father who can afford to make sacrifices for his children. Why? Because his capacity and ability are expanded.
6) A DJ, having reached consciousness, is aware that what falls into his hands is more easily held than what is brutishly clutched.

:up: YES! YES! THAT IS EXACTLY IT!!! :up:

[Gangster Of Love]

All true, but why is he losing it this time?


Hmm, perhaps he is fed up. Perhaps, like all of us, he has a boiling point. All of us have had episodes in our life that we said and/or did things that were considered extreme.

Most actors are very "emotionally expressive", which means they are drama queens and tend to really react to extremems. You combine it with the bitterness of a nasty divorce and all the things that it brings, and you have a meltdown in your hands.

We really don't know the whole story; yes, that is not the best thing to do to a 11 or 12 year old child. He has major anger issues and seems like his ex-wife has a lot to do with in how they come out of.

More than anything, I feel embarrased for him. Just remember, no matter how thin you slice it, there are two sides to every story.

[Gangster Of Love]

[QUOTE][QUOTE=( . )( . rolleyes: )]:

I got one for you too.


Your complaining about wyldfire. Idiot have you read anything on sosuave lately. 90% of the posters on here are an absolute joke. Wyldfire is better than 90% of the posters on here.




When was the last time you got laid by anyone? You strike me as the type of guy that does not get laid. The only attention you get from woman is negative attention.

You might have a point about her posts better than 90% of the posters here. It says more about the quality of the posts (or lack thereof), and knowledge of the men on this site. That is why when sombody responds "Just read everything here, that is all you need", I just laugh.

[DJDamage]

Not to excuse his behaviour but there are two sides to this story and his wife also used the child against him so its not one parent that is messed up but two. His wife used a private phone message and leaked it to the media in order to say FU back to Alec and also to gain favour in future court custody battle. Now this was a bitter divorce and part of the problem is that women who have custody of children out of a bad divorce are notorious in bad mouthing the ex husband to the child and brain wash them to think their way. Kim best revenge is to brain wash the child to hate Alec so much that she wouldn't ever want to see him again and thus Kim wins and the child end up losing.

[Wyldfire]

Not to excuse his behaviour but there are two sides to this story and his wife also used the child against him so its not one parent that is messed up but two. His wife used a private phone message and leaked it to the media in order to say FU back to Alec and also to gain favour in future court custody battle. Now this was a bitter divorce and part of the problem is that women who have custody of children out of a bad divorce are notorious in bad mouthing the ex husband to the child and brain wash them to think their way. Kim best revenge is to brain wash the child to hate Alec so much that she wouldn't ever want to see him again and thus Kim wins and the child end up losing.

Women are reactive by nature. If the man handles the divorce well, she is likely to do the same. Child custody is no exception to this rule. As I explained in one of my posts...my ex husband handled it terribly, went into court taking a combative stance. I honestly did not want to fight...I just wanted out of the marriage and to be done with it. I didn't want our children to hate their father and not have a relationship with him. I just wanted him to be able to keep his anger and bitterness out of his relationship with his kids. He couldn't do that. He put in me a position where I had to defend myself against his ridiculous accusations in court. He kept filing one motion after another based on his anger and bitterness...not on reality.

My 7 year old's father was just the opposite...and we have never had any problems at all. He never too a combative stance at all. We sat down and talked like adults. He told me what his concerns were and how he has seen his friends go through hell in child support and custody and visitation issues. I told him about how my ex behaved and how he gave me no choice but to fight with him even though I didn't want to. I asked him to trust me and follow my lead during our case manager meeting before any court hearings. He did trust me and behaved in the way I suggested. We never even had to go to court or go in front of a judge. It took all of an hour to sort out the details 7 years ago and we have never been back to the court house since.

As for "brainwashing"...kids aren't stupid and in the end, the kids figure out what's true and what's not. Most of the accusations of brainwashing are insecurity on the part of the person throwing around that accusation. As soon as those accusations come out, often it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy because the one accusing thinks they are "countering" the supposed brainwashing by saying bad things about the other parent. That ends up turning off the kids and they begin to pull away from the parent making the accusations.

I let one of my sons live with his father because our son wanted to try that. He was with his father for a year. Over that time, his father tried to keep our son from visiting with me and his siblings. My ex was trying to "get even" with what he thought was me being unfair. Although it hurt a great deal to not get time with my son, I was not going to behave badly and make the situation worse. I called my son once in awhile, but for the most part I let him know that it was up to him the level of contact he wanted to have. He called almost daily and wanted to visit badly. His father wanted me to beg and fight for visitation and I refused to do that. In the end, our son got angry with his father for not allowing him to visit. My ex had no choice but to let him visit because our son made living with him a nightmare until his father needed a break so bad he dropped him off. This is how non-custodial parents need to act. Nip this control game in the bud and don't let it hurt your kids.

Again...it does NOT matter how miserable either parent is with each other or what they are doing that is mean, unfair or rotten...you do NOT take it out on your child. period.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Hmm, perhaps he is fed up. Perhaps, like all of us, he has a boiling point. All of us have had episodes in our life that we said and/or did things that were considered extreme. ...

Take a look at Grinder's post.

[( . )( . )]

I don't hate men...I just have absolutely no respect for assholes and think they are completely and utterly useless. Anyone who treats their child as Alec Baldwin did is an arsehole .

So every mother thats chastised or called her child names in the heat of the moment should not be allowed to see her child aswell according to you , because as you keep telling us your not biased toward men right?....Woops you forgot about the other side of the coin in your rambling about the evil man Alec Baldwin, your a transparent joke.

Wyldliar logic: Extra extra !! 500 million mothers denied access to their children for calling them abusive words.

Pffft Oh but its just the men (ie: Alec Baldwin) isnt it?

Someone didnt think her covert man bashing argument out very much this time did she? , what a toolbag.

Alec Baldwin doesn't deserve to have any contact with his daughter at all


EDIT:And Glengarry Glen Ross kicks ass, Alec Baldwins the man.

[wayword]

Not to excuse his behaviour but there are two sides to this story and his wife also used the child against him so its not one parent that is messed up but two. His wife used a private phone message and leaked it to the media in order to say FU back to Alec and also to gain favour in future court custody battle. Now this was a bitter divorce and part of the problem is that women who have custody of children out of a bad divorce are notorious in bad mouthing the ex husband to the child and brain wash them to think their way. Kim best revenge is to brain wash the child to hate Alec so much that she wouldn't ever want to see him again and thus Kim wins and the child end up losing.Yea, I wouldn't be surprised if Kim brainwashed their daughter to hate him and used her as a tool against Alec. This is actually standard procedure... And can an 11-yo girl possibly be a spoiled bych? You betcha!

Point is, I'm sure there was a lot that drove Alec to this point and you can't judge the whole situation based on just one ugly phone call leaked out of context. I'm sure there was a lot more to this whole story.

[Wyldfire]

So every mother thats chastised or called her child names in the heat of the moment should not be allowed to see her child aswell according to you , because as you keep telling us your not biased toward men right?....Woops you forgot about the other side of the coin in your rambling about the evil man Alec Baldwin, your a transparent joke.

Wyldliar logic: Extra extra !! 500 million mothers denied access to their children for calling them abusive words.

Pffft Oh but its just the men (ie: Alec Baldwin) isnt it?

Someone didnt think her covert man bashing argument out very much this time did she? , what a toolbag.




EDIT:And Glengarry Glen Ross kicks ass, Alec Baldwins the man.

I don't care whether it's the mother or the father...if Kim were the one who left a voicemail like that over the little girl not answering the phone I would say the same thing about her. If the girl had stolen his car, stolen something, etc...then I would understand the anger...but this is ALL about the ex and the anger he has towards his ex. If he will take out his anger towards the ex over not answering a phone call then he will be even worse if the girl actually does something really bad.

[Wyldfire]

Yea, I wouldn't be surprised if Kim brainwashed their daughter to hate him and used her as a tool against Alec. This is actually standard procedure... And can an 11-yo girl possibly be a spoiled bych? You betcha!

Point is, I'm sure there was a lot that drove Alec to this point and you can't judge the whole situation based on just one ugly phone call leaked out of context. I'm sure there was a lot more to this whole story.

The best thing for both the child AND Alec is for them to have no contact for awhile until he deals with his anger towards her mother. If he continues to take out that anger on his daughter...she will hate him. IF Kim is "brainwashing" their daughter, the kid will figure it out and then it will be her mother that she hates. That's how it works...kids aren't stupid.

[Gangster Of Love]

Take a look at Grinder's post.

No. I like Bandler better.

[Gangster Of Love]

The best thing for both the child AND Alec is for them to have no contact for awhile until he deals with his anger towards her mother. If he continues to take out that anger on his daughter...she will hate him. IF Kim is "brainwashing" their daughter, the kid will figure it out and then it will be her mother that she hates. That's how it works...kids aren't stupid.

First of all, he will always be dealing with his anger, because he will always have that anger. That does not mean he shouldn't have a relationship with his daughter, ever again. Believe me, it will be a lot easier for him to realize what he did with the daughter, than to not have anger against his ex wife.

By the time the kid figures it out what her mom is doing, she will be even more messed up. The laws don't protect the real victims, the children. A lot of times the kids grow up believing what they've heard. Deep inside they will take the side of that very same parent who poisoned them for years. Have seen it in my own extended family. Have cousins in their 40's who were fed by their parent, usually the mother, and now hold resentment.

[Wyldfire]

First of all, he will always be dealing with his anger, because he will always have that anger. That does not mean he shouldn't have a relationship with his daughter, ever again. Believe me, it will be a lot easier for him to realize what he did with the daughter, than to not have anger against his ex wife.

By the time the kid figures it out what her mom is doing, she will be even more messed up. The laws don't protect the real victims, the children. A lot of times the kids grow up believing what they've heard. Deep inside they will take the side of that very same parent who poisoned them for years. Have seen it in my own extended family. Have cousins in their 40's who were fed by their parent, usually the mother, and now hold resentment.

You're assuming that the mother is actually doing what Baldwin is accusing her of doing. My ex husband accused me of the same thing and I wasn't doing any such thing. In fact, for years I was working hard to try to undo the damage he did to his relationship with his kids by telling them their father loved them and was just hurt and angry with me and that he really didn't mean what he said. Alec Baldwin sounded exactly like my ex husband.

Bottom line...the man is hurting his child...and the child refused to answer his calls. If my father spoke to me in that way when he called me I wouldn't answer the phone, either. If this voicemail was any indication of the way he speaks to his daughter it is no wonder she doesn't want to pick up the phone. On top of that...IF (and this is a big if) her mother is trash talking her ex to their child his behavior just reinforces that. How dumb can the guy be?

I gave an example of how I handled the situation when my youngest son spent a year living with his father. His father was trash talking me practically all day every day based on what our son told the arresting officer who responded to my ex husband assaulting our son. My ex refused to allow our son to come visit me or his siblings, too. I went 8 months without seeing him because his father was being rotten. I usually just waited for my son to call me because he had his own cell phone and he would call almost daily. I never asked him about his father and would tell him what was going on with the rest of the family and ask him about what was going on with him in school, sports and the like. His father desperately tried to make me angry and instigate a fight. I knew that and was not about to be pulled into nonsense that would only cause my children pain. Eventually, our son rebelled against his father's behavior and forced his father to bring him to visit. I knew patience would allow the situation to resolve itself.

Alec Baldwin has caused damage and the worst thing to do once that has happened is to push yourself on the child. He needs to deal with his issues with anger and wait for her to come around. If he pulls back and waits, then she most likely WILL come around. If he keeps pushing she will pull further and further away from him, resent him for not giving her the space she needs and will end up hating him.

The fact is...the cases of "brainwashing" isn't anywhere near as common as you guys think it is. It's also BEST dealt with by refusing to react to it. Have faith that your child has enough brains to see who is behaving badly and who isn't...especially at 11 years old. His daughter is old enough to see what's really going on. To me, the fact that she won't answer her father's calls tells me that it is her father who is behaving the worst out of her parents...and that she is sick of listening to it.

[Francisco d'Anconia]

No. I like Bandler better.

Perhaps because you've had a similar experience?