Most of the girls I've dated recently have been off of there, but I'm starting to wonder if MySpace is just evidence of a growing state of social dysfunction...meaning the people you find on there (no matter how many of them there are) aren't the type of people you'd want to spend quality time with.

Anyone else find that to be the case? I don't meet a lot of women through my normal routines. (I do "guy stuff"...working out, riding motorcycles, etc) So I've been supplementing with Myspace, but it seems like most of the women there have attachment issues, social stigma, just some kind of dysfunction or other.

I'm seriously considering disconnecting.

I've had this discussion with several of my friends and family recently: The decline of social skills.

You touch on something that has been grating on me for the last 8-10 months now. Apparently, with the growing popularity of the internet and "internet romance", there is a marked decline of "real time" social skills.

Consider the popularity of internet poker, for example. It's so popular because the human element is stripped away, leaving only the card game and odds. There is no human interaction. Now, people that come off of the internet and sit down at a table are at a loss because of all the extra "input". They have to hear conversations, whereas on the net they can choose not to look at the chat. So distracting!

I'm seeing more and more in social environments people are having a hard time UNDERSTANDING vocalized words because there are TONES and INFLECTIONS that must be considered. People are so used to reading words at text value, they just don't grasp meanings of vocalized expressions. If you seriously start paying attention to the volume of ridiculous misunderstandings that occur in conversations, it will mystify you.

Body language? Silence? Laughter? Yelling?

Since when does yelling SOUND LIKE THIS! Facial expressions have been replaced with , emphasis has been replaced with italics, and actual laughter has been replaced with "LOL".

No lie, I actually was in a conversation where I heard someone say something funny, and the other person replied with "El oh el." I kid you not, they said it with a straight face. Eek!

Look throughout these threads and see just how many people text or e-mail women to ask them for dates, and you'll have a hard time arguing that there ISN'T indeed a decline in social skills. And, when you consider how many actually SCORE dates that way, you'll know for certain.

Yea, I agree.

I prefer real-world PU's because you can practice all your non-verbal game. Not to mention all the girls you meet will obviously be local...

And the majority of girls looking on the net do have some major dysfunction.

Of course, the downside to real-world PU's are that you need a reliable wing and lots of spare time to go out regularly.

Well, in this world you also take what you can get. And if that means giving girls off the net a chance too, I guess so. It can just become a bad habit that ends up in disappointment after disappointment if you rely too much upon it...

squirrels said:

I'm starting to wonder if MySpace is just evidence of a growing state of social dysfunction...meaning the people you find on there (no matter how many of them there are) aren't the type of people you'd want to spend quality time with.

Click to expand...

I don't think its myspace an evidence of growing state of social dysfunction rather a way for people who already had social dysfunction to interact with each other. Society in general is growing in social dysfunction.

You don't approach every hot chick you see right? you only approach the chicks whom you get a good vibe or eye contact with. On myspace you message every hot chick you see and its like a lottary, you know you are going to get somesone but won't know who that someone is until you meet them.

If you have approached every hot chick you see you would have come to a conclusion that many people are socially dysfunctional. Add to the fact that hot women do not have to strive for a personality, more people spend time with technology then people and sexuality is confide to the bedroom as Pook puts it, and you got yourself this growing trend and reality.

I'm starting to formulate an idea that women online don't actually want a REAL relationship. I think the fantasy, or virtual relationship, has more value to many women online. With real men, you have to mess with schedules, moods, logistics... far too much work! But online dating? Well, clickety-click and PRESTO! New boyfriend! That one not playing along? clickety-click! Next one! Who needs all that pesky suffering from breakups and sh!t?

You can just sit in front of the computer with a vibrator and virtually have a boyfriend! No fuss, no muss!

^ Well, the net is GREAT for attention hors...

They can spin dozens of online plates at the same time and bask in the male validation of being WANTED, all without any real-life commitment or mess.

The key difference here is this:

- If she wants to escalate and meet fairly quickly - like by a few weeks or a month, then she wants a real-ationship.

- If she still shows no desire to meet after a month, then she is just stringing you along as an attention-buddy (similar to a f-buddy) and using you ONLY for attention. In short, she is NEVER going to want to meet-up and f you.

A few weeks? A month?

Do you actually wait longer than a week?

Man... that might explain why I'm not having much luck. I push for real-time meeting after the third or forth e-mail. Please don't tell me I have to actually jack around for a month!

Here I was thinking that chicks were AW's! I'm just lazy?

Vulpine said:

A few weeks? A month?

Do you actually wait longer than a week?

Man... that might explain why I'm not having much luck. I push for real-time meeting after the third or forth e-mail. Please don't tell me I have to actually jack around for a month!

Here I was thinking that chicks were AW's! I'm just lazy?

Click to expand...

Well, I was giving a max wait. And that's also including LD chix who can't just meet locally at the drop of a hat.

Bottomline is - if she don't want to meet after a reasonable amount of time (like a month MAX - or a few weeks if she's local), she ain't EVER gonna want to meet.

OTOH, I'd also be a bit suspicious if she wants to meet TOO fast like right off the bat cuz that could mean she's damaged goods and desperate...

Yeah, it's amazing to me how many people prefer depersonalized "interaction." The internet is a great place for dissemination of information and exchange of ideas, but not supposed to be a replacement for interprersonal interaction.

The flip side is good interpersonal skills will have even greater value.

You can just sit in front of the computer with a vibrator and virtually have a boyfriend! No fuss, no muss!

Click to expand...

Dunno about the "no muss" bit...

I think it depends on how its used. If its the only way someone uses to meet the opposite sex, then its a problem. For the most part is supplementary and actually could be a good thing. The potential is there to meet someone good or the special someone or just a decent new friend. Its just another avenue to meet people who people you aren't running into in the "real world". I've met a few decent girls off there, and some new fishing partners. All were people I'd have never met if I hadn't met them off myspace. Its just another tool and actually some game that can work for you while you are out participating in the real world and requires minimal effort on your part.

ive never been on myspace. ill never go on myspace. i think myspace and all these other social network sites are bullsh*t.

i wasted enough time in my life when i was younger on IRC.

the only place i 'waste' time electronically socializing is on here.

people who are wasting their time 'hanging out' in cyberspace are all the same because they are people who aren't developing their REAL lives the way they should.

so its no surprise that they all have the same flaws.

It's a lot easier to meet and date girls in real life - my opinion. I've had a few terrible online dating experiences. It is true what they say, the girl is ALWAYS 20 lbs. heavier in real life. Instead of supplementing with myspace, try college. If you don't live near one, move closer to one, get involved in activities, etc.

wayword said:

Bottomline is - if she don't want to meet after a reasonable amount of time (like a month MAX - or a few weeks if she's local), she ain't EVER gonna want to meet.

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Hah! What? I've always met them after only one conversation on the phone! And ask within the first 5 or 10 minutes! No time wasted. A month? That's crazy! (wasted time, only to find out she's a 200 lb. b!tch!)

I work a 60-hour work week and tried myspace to supplement but just as I got my myspace game going on, I stopped. I would hesitate to say they're all the same but damn they're all the same. They're just so utterly... uninteresting... in my book. I have much better success meeting dynamic women at bars than I ever did on myspace.

It is true what they say, the girl is ALWAYS 20 lbs. heavier in real life.

Click to expand...

Yeah, I found the rule of thumb: if she looks thin, add ten pounds; if she looks normal, add twenty-five pounds; if she looks fat, add fifty pounds.

joekerr31 said:

ive never been on myspace. ill never go on myspace. i think myspace and all these other social network sites are bullsh*t.

i wasted enough time in my life when i was younger on IRC.

Click to expand...

Myspace serves different purposes for different people.

I see a lot of the younger crowd using it MORE to connect with other people, whereas the older generation tends to use it more to keep in touch with people you meet or know in real life.

One of my employees is 23-24 and weighs about 350lbs. One of the coolest kids you will ever meet, but his weight is obviously a factor when it comes to meeting women. Despite this fact, this guy actually has chicks contacting HIM on Myspace. I've been on for a good year or so and I have NEVER had a chick message me.

On the other end of the spectrum, one of my lady friends is 36 and she uses it mainly to keep in touch with a friend of hers that moved to Japan.

I don't use it to meet people. (Been curious about it but don't know how I would fit it in to my schedule)

Yea, for the most part it's a big waste of time, but it serves it's purpose. To be honest, the best thing about it for me is social proof. I also use it to market my business. Kinda fun to fukk around on there from time to time late at night too.

Stormbringer said:

And for all you know, most of those women you successfully meet at bars are on Myspace, too.

All these sites serve more as convenience; women can easily dismiss guys they're not interested in by not writing back or rejecting a friend request....obviously much easier and non-confrontational than rejecting in person. Not to mention that a lot of women are tired of the same old sh!t found in the bar and club scene.

As time goes on, websites like Myspace will become way more integrated into society, becoming the norm. Remember when most people didn't have cellphones...

Click to expand...

True, true, and true.

I knew myspace was here to stay when I started seeing cell phones targeted at myspace users.

It's lust another way to stay connected in a connected world. Hell, I pretty much freak out if I am away from my cell phone for more than a few minutes, and I'm 35!

squirrels said:

Most of the girls I've dated recently have been off of there, but I'm starting to wonder if MySpace is just evidence of a growing state of social dysfunction...meaning the people you find on there (no matter how many of them there are) aren't the type of people you'd want to spend quality time with.

Anyone else find that to be the case? I don't meet a lot of women through my normal routines. (I do "guy stuff"...working out, riding motorcycles, etc) So I've been supplementing with Myspace, but it seems like most of the women there have attachment issues, social stigma, just some kind of dysfunction or other.

I'm seriously considering disconnecting.

Click to expand...

disconnect.

myspace used to be ok for chicks...a year or so ago. in fact there's some older threads on it, that i and others posted, using various strategies.

but now it's a total waste of time and actually quite humiliating.

if you really want to know what's up, create a couple of fake chick profiles and see what is in "your" (e.g. "her") inbox. go ahead and try it and see what messages you get. you will projectile vomit.

at some point, very quickly, you will realize that even messages from fairly decent guys are a joke. in fact you are a joke! there is nothing, absolutely nothing that you can say that doesn't sound fvckin lame ass. nothing!

a simple, Hi, how are you doing today? sounds lame ass.

go ahead and see for yourself.

i've kinda sorta asked three chicks out from myspace in the last year. i pretty much refuse to do it nowadays. you get this uneasy feeling that you are throwing yourself into the dumpster that is her inbox.

plus, here's the usual course of events on myspace.

1. for whatever reason, you get into a good email vibe with a chick.

2. all systems seem to be a "go".

3. you say, ok...let's meet up.

4. poof...she disappears.

5. she goes onto the next dude, filling her lonely life searching for a penpal.

wash, rinse, repeat.


not to even mention that every new chick that gets onto myspace is actually a russian spammer selling web cam chicks or penis enlargements. the amount of profile spam on myspace is very incredible. i know of someone who knows of someone who had 20,000 fake chick profiles.

you might want to disconnect, and i've been threatening myself. but i have over 2,000 chicks on my friends list, most of whom are from at least a year ago. and i have had opportunities, but man....i just refuse to ask them out even though i'd probably get a meeting. i am absolutely positive that many chicks in the last year were just waitin for me to ask them out. i didn't...they bailed.

so instead what i am going to do is explain all of this on my profile or a blog entry and pretty much state point blank...

I REFUSE TO ASK ANY CHICK OUT ON THIS SITE...

you wanna see my mug face to face, you do the asking sweetie.

contrary to DJ principles, but if you explain it the right way, you can probably...maybe...set yourself apart from the 99% of the chumps on that site.

create some fakies and see what i'm taking about. you will care about it about as much as i do these days...not a flying fvcking flip!

Stormbringer said:

And for all you know, most of those women you successfully meet at bars are on Myspace, too.

Click to expand...

that's the very sad part of it...virtually all chicks under 30, certainly 25 y/o, have a myspace account.

so i said last year, "i refuse to go out with myspace chicks"! in fact, for a while when i would meet a chick i would ask if she had a myspace account. if yes, bye bye. if no, ok...she passed my screen.

i quickly discovered that my opportunities were cut by 90%.

myspace is the worst, most viral disease, that humanity has ever seen, infecting 160m+ people thus far. it's really ****ed things up because as per my last post....

women on myspace, and the incredible volume of crap they get from guys...it has to make them think even lower of men in general, myspace or not. it has to.

i'm really down on myspace. it's a piece of steamy doggy doo doo.

Myspace is incredibly sad; everyone on there basically going "look at me, love me, i have an identity, i'm different" when most of them haven't an original thought in their head and latch on to the idolatory of some loser obscure (it has to be offcourse) band, artist, celebrity to give them a sense of self.

When the truth is if you get down to it; like everthing in society it's the superficial that counts. No one gives a **** what you're in to, as long as you're hot. If anything Myspace increases this because it's impossible to get by with your personality though this kind of medium unlike the real world, even there it's getting harder.