I was out with a female friend, and she tells me I "need to take... more opportunities." (She knows that I take some risks)... I look at her (half confused) for a moment, she ****s her head to the side as she's staring at me (and did I see a little nod?). I've been flirting, but I thought she wouldn't be interested because she's seemed lukewarm (even several days before she was saying how much she wanted to do before dating anyone, and how busy she is). So I'm a little confused.

Ok, is this chick interested, or is she just messing with my head? Based on yesterday, I'm thinking she has some interest. But other than that there's no flirting back, an occasional hug, etc.

Now she seems like she's getting closer to me (physical space)... I left her alone for a few minutes, did my own thing, and she came to find me (good thing). She always agrees to hang out (good thing).

But she will claim (in front of others, come to think of it) that she wants a patient guy who won't jump the gun (riiiiight. Suuuuure. Ok, Gotcha. LJBF)

I'm interested, but I didn't actively pursue because I got the "friends first" BS almost the instant we met. So I've just been doing what I could to be a much more secure me. I've just done what I could do be kind (to everyone), while avoiding the "nice guy" stereotype (I don't try to go out of my way as much, and I'm more willing to voice my POV even if it isn't in line with hers).

I'm not sure if she's talking about opportunites in general (still) as a friend, or if I'm misreading signals, or if she's just playing for her own esteem.

Mental said:

I was out with a female friend, and she tells me I "need to take... more opportunities." (She knows that I take some risks)... I look at her (half confused) for a moment, she ****s her head to the side as she's staring at me (and did I see a little nod?). I've been flirting, but I thought she wouldn't be interested because she's seemed lukewarm (even several days before she was saying how much she wanted to do before dating anyone, and how busy she is). So I'm a little confused.

Ok, is this chick interested, or is she just messing with my head? Based on yesterday, I'm thinking she has some interest. But other than that there's no flirting back, an occasional hug, etc.

Now she seems like she's getting closer to me (physical space)... I left her alone for a few minutes, did my own thing, and she came to find me (good thing). She always agrees to hang out (good thing).

But she will claim (in front of others, come to think of it) that she wants a patient guy who won't jump the gun (riiiiight. Suuuuure. Ok, Gotcha. LJBF)

I'm interested, but I didn't actively pursue because I got the "friends first" BS almost the instant we met. So I've just been doing what I could to be a much more secure me. I've just done what I could do be kind (to everyone), while avoiding the "nice guy" stereotype (I don't try to go out of my way as much, and I'm more willing to voice my POV even if it isn't in line with hers).

I'm not sure if she's talking about opportunites in general (still) as a friend, or if I'm misreading signals, or if she's just playing for her own esteem.

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Bro, there is only one way to find out. ASK HER OUT!

ChrizZ said:

Bro, there is only one way to find out. ASK HER OUT!

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That is the way things are done in high school. That kind of stuff usually doesn't fly post high school. You probably don't want to ask her out directly. Doing so will likely result in awkwardness. The whole "I like you, let's date" kind of thing is lame. Unless the girl is already VERY interested in you, it just doesn't work like that. I have seen it happen to others and I must confess that I made that mistake before. Again, it does NOT work unless she is already totally in to you.

The best thing to do is not "befriend" a girl you would consider dating in the first place. Make your intentions known, but not explicitly stated in words. The fact that you are on the forum seriously considering the option means that you must have had SOME intent when you first met her, even if she was unavailable or whatever.

You're already past that, so my next piece of advice is to guage her comfortable with you. Get closer to her physically, see how she reacts...but make it natural. Don't do it if it feels forced. You want to avoid any awkwardness. Start doing things together that are more relationship-like. Be more aggressive and assertive around her. Make sure she sees your fun side as well. You will just know when she is open for it and it will occur cpontaneously, don't force it.

Always, always, always let her see your strong side. Do not ask her for advice or show your weak/sensitive side thinking that she'll be all over you. Women are there for you to be with, not to confide in. Men do not confide in women. If she sees weakness, she will lose attraction. Women look to men for STRENGTH. Not the other way around. It just naturally occurs that way.